In my defense to Grandpa's Revisionist-Robin email (notice, it's still alliterated), I didn't actually LOSE my cell phone, it sort of lost me.

But I must digress.

Last week, in a series of very unfortunate events, I ran my cell phone through Grandma's washing machine. (I consider it very fortunate that Grandma used the unscented, dye-free detergent, the affect on my cell phone could have been considerably worse had there been more chemicals in the water.)

The boys were able to dissect my cell phone, let it dry for a day or so, and then reconstruct. The external speaker doesn't work so I can't use speakerphone or the ringer, but now I don't have to worry about my phone ringing in church.

On Friday last, the rainiest day that Dallas has seen in its recent history, Joey and I went to NorthPark mall. We realized we were tired about as soon as we walked in the door, so we ran back out into the rain to our car.

Aparrently I left my phone in the door of the car. Perhaps it fell out when I slammed the door. Perhaps it fell out of my sweater pocket. Perhaps The Cell Phone Grinch took it and flung it across the parking lot into the deepest puddle it could find.

At any rate, my brother Andrew (who is staying at my parent's house while they're in Mexico for the week) received a strange voicemail on my parent's answering machine. It was from a very nice lady in Plano who found my cell phone in the parking lot, clicked through the numbers until she found one that read "Dad and Mom", and then left them a message with her number.

Andrew, being the responsible younger brother that he is, called us with the number. We called the lady back and, within 24 hours, were on our way to Plano.

(I will not attempt to humiliate myself further by relating how hopelessly I got us lost on the way. Suffice it to say that we stopped somewhere in Plano at a Wal-Mart and got two Dallas maps. I need to be mare careful when I write down directions off Google Maps.)

Once reunited with my cell phone, I gleefully tried to check my voicemail. To my chagrin, Joey pointed out that Send, 1,4,7 and * no longer worked. (Pretty much all the buttons on the left.)

So now I am left with a phone that doesn't ring, doesn't dial, doesn't really answer very well, and essentially doesn't do much except sit there and look cool.

Nuts.