Pull Over, I'm Gonna Hurl!

No, I didn't say that.  (But I was feeling like it as I was somewhere into the second mile of my run last night, realizing I hadn't waited long enough after I ate dinner...) 

On Monday evening, Joey and I were driving home in rush hour on the freeway.  It was a lot slower than usual and, once we hit Mockingbird, traffic stopped altogether.  We were in the far lane and we slammed on our brakes to avoid rear-ending the large white truck in front of us.  (It really wasn't that dramatic, but come on.  It sounds better.)

Suddenly, the large white truck veered over onto the shoulder and pulled up next to the brown minivan it had been behind.

"That's...really weird."  I said to Joey.

"No, it was good.  He was just trying not to rear-end the van since he stopped so fast."

It hadn't really looked like the white truck had to stop that fast to me, so I was doubtful of this explanation.  The white van crept forward a little bit more and we pulled up alongside it.  The passenger door began to wiggle. I thought, Wouldn't that be disgusting if the passenger leaned out of the car and--

My worst fears were confirmed.  The wiggling passenger door flew fully open and a man leaned out of the car....

...and threw up all over the freeway.

"OHHHHH!!!"  I wailed and covered my face with my hands.  I hate seeing people throw up.  It makes me feel sympathetic and like I'm going to be sick as well.  "Is he done yet?"  Of course we were still stuck in traffic and sitting right next to the puking man.

"Yeah, he's done."  Joey replied.  He seemed to have an aura of feeling awesome about him, like he'd just seen something really disgusting but also rare and was really proud.

"That was the sickest thing ever," I moaned and squinted my eyes to check that the coast was truly clear.

"It wasn't very chunky though," Joey said as he (finally!) started accelerating and we drove past the barf man.

"I didn't want to hear that."  I pouted.

"Can you imagine?  All of a sudden that guy must have been like, 'Pull over, I'm gonna hurl!'"

"I don't want to imagine.  So disgusting."

And that was how Joey and I were treated to the sight of a man barfing all over the freeway.  It's a sight I hope never to experience again, especially at such close range.  And, if you're really looking for the silver lining, we were fortunate enough to be just far enough away that we don't need to take our car to the car wash.

(That's not to imply that our car is actually clean and does not to see the inside of a car wash, regardless of Mr. Barfer on the freeway.)