The Dead Bug Skin

Last week Joey and I were coming in from walking The Fiend (aka Henry) when Joey noticed something large and disgusting stuck to the side of the building.

"Hey, Jenna, come here and look at this!" 

I came over to see what he was pointing at.  About two feet off the ground was a white, scaly bug with large eyes and wings.  (It was not a cockroach.)

"What is that thing?"  I asked, horrified and awed at the same time.

"It's a bug."  Joey said, knowledgeably. "I knew you'd want to see it."

He was right, as always.

I got real close to the bug and blew on it.  It didn't move, which was OK with me because it was seriously enormous.  (Kind of like a bumblebee only about 4 times the size and all white and scaly and with longer, more disgusting legs.)

On Friday night I noticed that The Bug was still there, stuck to the side of the building.  I got closer and looked at it again and, after a through examination, determined it to be the skin of a Cicada.  Very gross, indeed.

On Saturday while laying out at the pool I was treated to a Cicada flying and buzzing all around me for an hour.  (Perhaps it is the same Cicada who forgot his clothes by my front door?) 

At any rate, I was pleased.  I had never seen a Cicada flying around before and was glad to have something to watch as I floated aimlessly around in the pool on my raft.

Saturday evening as I was reading in bed I suddenly had a Very Bad Idea.

"Will you go get that Cicada off the side of the building for me?"  I asked Joey, sweetly.

"Um, no."  He said.

"Why?"  I asked.

"Because.  There's no reason for you to need a dead bug off the side of the building, especially if--"

"Yes, I am going to send it to The Kid. In the next care package."

"Oh man.  I am definitely not involved.  If you are going to mail that thing you have to get it off the building yourself."  He was trying not to laugh at me and not really succeeding.

I put on my best "I'm better than you think at picking dead bugs off the side of buildings" look and marched out the door.

I almost chickened out.  Apparently Mr. Cicada had dug his nails into the building really, really hard before shedding his skin, and that made it a lot harder to pry him off the building.  But, I am happy to say that I succeeded without actually having to touch it.

I took the dead bug straight inside where I put it under Joey's nose so he could be sure to see it very well.

"That thing is disgusting," Joey said.  He was somewhere between entirely grossed out that I'd brought a dead Cicada skin into the house and impressed that I'd actually gotten it myself.

"I know, that's why I'm mailing it to The Kid of course."  I said. I shook the Cicada skin around in the container a few times. "I'm going to make a bed of cotton balls for it so it doesn't get all crunched by the mailman."

"That's disgusting."  Joey repeated and went back to reading A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court.

I dumped the Cicada out on the counter and added three cotton balls.  I then scooped the Cicada back into the container.  He looked much more disgusting and close now that he wasn't rolling around on the bottom of the container anymore.  His nails were digging into the cotton balls and keeping him in place.

"See?"  I showed Joey. "It's perfect."

"Yes...yes, that works very nicely." He said, noncommittally.

And so that's why I've had a dead Cicada skin in one of my plastic containers sitting on my dresser for the last two nights.  Not that anyone has really been asking, I just wanted to share.

And Grams, I think you're right about poor Joey getting a Double Portion.  Not only does he have to tolerate the Cicada, he's also hidden all my birthday gifts in an undisclosed location until my birthday.  I tried to open one on Friday and he confiscated it, so now I have no idea where any of them are.

I'm more trouble than a 5 year old...and yet I'm turning 25.