Retraction...unfortunately

So my toe's not broken. Disgustingly black and decroded, but not broken.

I know this because when I was at the chiropractor this evening my rehab therapist glanced down, saw the lovely tape job I had done and said, "What did you do to your toe?"

"Busted it or something," I said.

"We should take a shot of it," she said.

All I heard was "take a shot" and thought she meant a shot-shot...like with a needle.

"Um, that's OK....." I said.

"No, I'll go tell Doc and then we'll go in the other room. Just one film is all we'll need to tell if it's broken."

Oh, an X-ray. I can handle that.

So I took off the tape and showed her the black nastiness.

"Wow, that's...gross," she said.

And it is.

We "took the shot" and she ran into the darkroom to develop it. The chiropractor took a look at my toe while we waited for the film to be developed. I told him it didn't hurt much at all anymore, which it doesn't. (Unless I jam it into The Kid's duffle bag, which I did on Monday.)

The X-ray came back quite conclusive: it ain't broken.

I did jam it and have some kind of contusion something-or-other in the nail, but I don't know what that means. My chiro said I might want to poke a hole in the nail to relieve some of the pressure.

I wanted to tell him to poke a hole in his toe to relieve some of the pressure, but I wisely held my tongue.

I'm ain't poking no holes in my toenail, decroded or otherwise. That's insanity. And sounds really painful.

And, so, Joey was right all along. My toe was never broken (although it hurt like a banshee) and I still have never broken any bones. Life seems a bit bleak with this new revelation.