Jamie flew into town this morning and, shortly after she arrived, we decided that our best course of action was to take a walk. Henry was being obnoxious because he was so excited to see Jamie, and we hoped that by walking he'd blow off some steam.
We set out briskly. In order to avoid being hit by cars, we went the long way around the athletic fields and set out on the walking trail. Our object, aside from burning Henry out, was to feed the creepy catfish, ducks, squirrels, and whatever else we found along the way.
About five minutes into our walk, I noticed a turtle who was rather off course. So far off course, in fact, that he was quite far away from the lakes (probably a three hour turtle walk, about 10 minutes for a human) and sitting atop a little rise.
"Jamie! Look! A turtle!" I squeaked and pointed. Henry pulled at the leash in anticipation of smelling the turtle.
"Ohh, cool." We stood over the turtle for a few moments with Henry sniffing at all the appropriate times.
Jamie bent over to pick up the turtle. "You can make them pass out if you hold them upside down," she explained. "All amphibians are like that."
Just as she picked the turtle up off the ground, it began to um, Use The Bathroom all over my foot.
"HEY!" I shrieked, "The turtle's peeing!"
"Oh." Jamie set the turtle down. "It's a defense mechanism."
"I should say." I shook my foot off. Henry intently sniffed the ground, analyzing the new smells.
"Let's try again." She picked up the turtle (I stepped out of the line of fire this time) and flipped him over onto his back.
He didn't pass out. He sort of blinked at us in an upside-down sort of way and paddled his little swimmers every so often. Actually, he wasn't even looking drowsy.
"Um, Jamie?" I said.
"I know, I know, a few more minutes." We waited.
People walking by were starting to give us odd looks. This is most likely because we were standing there holding a dripping turtle upside down and starting at it.
Jamie sighed. "He's not passing out."
"No, I guess not." I said, as Jamie set the turtle down. Henry bounded over to sniff the turtle again.
For good measure, Jamie picked the turtle up one more time. Immediately he began to "defend himself" (read: go to the bathroom), so Jamie put him back down.
"You know, that first time he got my foot." I said, as we walked away.
"NO! Really? Sorry, I didn't see that," Jamie said.
"Yep." I answered.
So today I learned two things:
1. Turtles go to the bathroom when you pick them up, so stand clear
2. They're supposed to pass out if you hold them upside down
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It's a good thing you guys stopped when you did. They pass out because they're suffocating; they can't breathe when they're upside down. Just letting you know for future reference, should you ever encounter one of the little guys up close again.
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