Breathe-Rightgate

And, thus, Pops has been indicted in yet another Breathe-Right scandal. (Unfortunately I have already blogged here and and here and here about Pops' propensity to forget/leave/save his Breathe-Rights all over the place, I will try to keep this one as short as possible.)

A month ago I was sitting on the futon in our living staring at our bookshelves in a sleepy sort of way. I noticed something strange hanging off one of the shelves, so I got up and went over to see what it was.

It was a Breathe-Right, of course.

"JOEY!" I hollered.

"What?" He asked, lifting his head up off the couch.

"I found a Breathe-Right. On the bookshelf."

He ran over to come inspect. Sure enough, there it was, stuck to our bookshelf for who knows how long.

"That thing has to have been there for a month," he said. "Since your parents were here."

"I know. How did we miss it all this time?!" I said, gingerly unsticking it from the cheap "wood" shelf.

I folded it up and threw it away, hoping to be rid of it.

And then this afternoon Joey called me.

"Hi, babe, I thought I should let you know what's going on here." Famous last words. My mind raced as I tried to figure out what could possibly have gone wrong.

"What?" I hesitantly asked.

"Well, I was letting Henry out of the kitchen and I picked up one of the chairs and I noticed something sticky was on it. So I reached down and pulled it off. Guess what it was?"

The only thing that was running through my head was cockroach and I didn't think those were sticky enough when squished to adhere to the bottom of chair legs, so I just said, "Um...."

"A Breathe-Right!" He crowed. "Another one!"

I was beginning to wonder if the kids had formed some sort of evil conspiracy when they were here. My cell phone goes missing, the camera is stolen, and we find a Breathe-Right when no one who uses Breathe-Rights has been anywhere near our house in three months.

"That is disturbing. I need to call my Pops on the way home from work tonight." I said.

Maybe he's teleporting them to us...or maybe flying his remote-controlled plane on bombing missions and dropping them in through our chimney.

It's probably the remote-controlled airplane one.